Hearty Heresy


Keep It Simple Stupid…I Mean, God
April 11, 2007, 11:40 am
Filed under: Bible, Christianity, Heresy, Religion, Theology

The other day while I was searching the web looking for references to my all time favorite orthodox statement of faith (“God said it. I believe it. That settles it!”), I ran across this entry at DefCon Blog. It contains a link to a clip from Friends of God, an HBO documentary by Alexandra Pelosi about evangelicals in America. As DefCon says, “The clip focuses on the creation movement and highlights yet again the aggressive tactics creationists employ when it comes to ‘teaching’ (a.k.a. indoctrinating) children.” It’s about six minutes long, but it’s certainly worth watching, especially to see the slogan “God said it. I believe it. That settles it!” used in context. (Question: Who ya gonna believe, kids? God or a scientist? Answer: God! Yaaaaay!)

If you take a look at the clip, you’ll see the problem of dinosaurs is a big part of what these evangelical anti-evolutionists are dealing with. And that reminded me of an audio clip from a comedy routine by the late, great Saint Bill Hicks I heard a couple of years ago (I was sitting in my car waiting to go through an automated car wash when this routine was played on a college radio station…I imagine that someone got in trouble because of Bill’s liberal use of the earthly equivalent of Battlestar Galactica‘s “frack“). So here’s the deal. If you took a look at the Friends of God clip and find it as creepy as I do, do yourself a favor and listen to “Dinosaurs in the Bible,” available at Past Peak.

One more note on Bill Hicks. I call him Saint Bill because, well, because of this:

I had a vision of a way we could have no enemies ever again if you’re interested in this. Anybody interested in hearing this? It’s kind of an interesting theory and all we have to do is make one decisive act and we could rid the world of all our enemies at once. Here’s what we do: You know all that money that we spend on nuclear weapons and defense every year? Trillions of dollars. Instead, if we spent that money feeding and clothing the poor of the world, which it would pay for many times over, not one human being excluded, not ONE; We could as one race explore outer space together in peace, for ever.

Feeding and clothing the poor so that not one human being would be excluded. Hmmm. Sounds like something I heard before. Could it be the Kingdom of God?

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6 Comments so far
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There’s a dinosaur buried in my back yard. He dates back to the fifth day of creation 🙂

Should I call the producers and see if I can get into a video as a wacky creationist?

In all seriousness, thanks for bringing some of the loony fringe amongst we evangelicals to the forefront! 🙂

Comment by j4jesus

I have to admit, it’s the thought of being in the same barrel with those non-monkey-descendants that keeps me from wanting to call myself a Christian…but I suppose that that’s a very un-Christian attitude. I’m not very comfortable with the humanist fringe either, come to think of it. What’s a heretic to do?

Comment by heartyheretic

I hear that when Jesus takes us up in the Rapture he will leave behind the missing dinosaurs that he took with him in the first place. I think I read that in a Tim Lehaye book.

Comment by pastorofdisaster

So the dinosaurs have already been raptured? Well that explains it all then. Thanks!

Comment by heartyheretic

It’s in Revelations somewhere I am sure.

Comment by pastorofdisaster

[…] so scary, I’d say it was hi-fraking-larious. These are the same people I blogged about a while back, the ones whose logic runs like this: Creation Guy: Hey, kids, just because the word […]

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